Agency vs Suffering

How will you put your freedom to work? To the degree you have agency in your life, how will you use it to enrich the lives of others? It is tempting to look upon the canvas of others and cast judgment. It may even be tempting to draw lines on their canvas to produce an image fitting your expectations.

But constraining the freedom of others because you fear how they might use it sets a terrible precedent. Life is complicated and humans are flawed. The societal context for what is “right” and “good” are subjective moving targets on the best of days. The odds of an individual making choices which align to every other individual’s expectations is impossible.

Consider if the world operated exactly as you defined.

People will inevitably make choices that hurt us, that hurt themselves. Our duty is to release the illusion of control for those things beyond our actions. We must forgive and use our experiences to make better choices because that is how we show up in the world.

As to the interactions we have with others, have compassion with the ambiguity that we all cope with, the uncertainty that freedom naturally produces. This uncertainty is given weight by the risk we all face. Have no doubt that we face the risk of death, for ourselves and those we love each and every day.

But to assign to others responsibility for your well being, for the well being of your family, is to court heartbreak. Those people out there, they could never love your family like you do. Those people could never live up to the designs in your mind because they aren’t you. Seize your opportunity to act intentionally, to fulfill your expectations of the world by demonstration.

People are rarely open to an outside opinion, and on the occasion they are, they’ll seek it out. So if you’re just such a person, in such an occasion, I hope you find my thoughts helpful.